C.U.B.S.

Scary dream last night. The first of its kind for me actually.

I'm on my way to the emergency room, because I somehow got punched or kicked in the nose at work. My mom is driving me, and the Man is along for moral support. We get to the hospital and go in to see the doctor. A non-memorable indian man checks out my nose, and declares it completely fine. Suddenly I'm talking to his female assistant, as I no longer require his service. She says that it's great that I'm here, so they can give me some of the test results from my physical last week. Wonderful! Saves me a trip! I ask a few questions.

"Well, the *indistinct* test went great, you tested negative on the *indistinct* test, and the other test came back fine."

"But," I ask. "Didn't I take four tests? What were the results on the fourth test?"

"Oh, that's not really... something we can just talk about casually. I can't really disclose that information until the doctor is back."

So now I'm freaking out. Why aren't they telling me how the test went? Obviously something is wrong. I'm panicking in the doctor's office, pacing back and forth, trying to get some more information from this woman. She says nothing. What feels like forever later, the doctor comes back in and asks me to sit down.

"So, from the test results," he says as sensitively as he can. "It looks like you have CUBS."

"...what?" Having never heard of this illness before, I inquired.

"It stands for Calcium Unsufficient Bone Syndrome. It's a very dangerous disease. But don't worry, the odds are in your favour. It's all going to turn out okay."

"What exactly are the odds? What's the next step here?" I ask, as the doctor leaves the room. Another long, long waiting period later he comes back in and hands the nurse a form, then leaves again. The soft spoken nurse begins to speak.

"So, basically, the doctor has come up with a simple six month plan to get you back to normal. We're just going to need you to sign this form to get you on a donor list, and we can get this moving along."

"A donor list? For what?"

"Oh, well you're going to need at least four bone marrow transplants throughout the process. It should take 3 - 6 months before we can get a donor for you." The nurse sees the turmoil in my face, and continues. "You really needn't worry, 2 out of 3 people who suffer from this make it through."

I am now completely inconsollible, as those are not very good odds at all. The Man slides over to where I am, while I wonder where he's been the whole time, and tries to comfort me in my grief.

"I really don't know why you're getting so worked up about this," he starts, in his softest tone. "It's all going to turn out fine. It's a good thing they caught it so early. You have always been really weak, especially in your bones. And this will make it all better!"

His comforting words offer no refuge.

I take the forms and sign them, seeing all the names above mine on the list, and hand the form back to the nurse, who is smiling as if unfazed by my fatal news. "Thank you," she chirps as my heart drops to the pit of my stomach.

And then I wake up.

Crazy, right? Probably one of the most terrifying dreams I've ever had! And I've never ever had one like this before! I'm just impressed with my imagination!

C.U.B.S.? Priceless!

Although my subconscious grammar could use some work. Unsufficient? That's not a word...